After two days of Gudiya's birthday, Sarita lost her voice . Her lungs were choked by the infection . Doctors left everything on God. On 7 jan 2010 Gudiya and brother were sitting beside their Mom. She was breathing very heavily and by gestures she was telling them to go and sleep. She holds gudiya's hand and told her to go away. Sarita was staring at lord krishna's photo. Gudiya kept on praying and crying and even that tough hours sarita's mother in law and husband were asleep. Gudiya ran to wake them up and called doctor. Suddenly Sarita closed her eyes and gudiya shouted like anything..all of a sudden a lot of blood started coming out ..all family members tried to take away Gudiya but she did not leave her hand. Finally she closed her eyes forever and was gone to some better world. It was the kind of end of everything for Gudiya. She was not ready to leave her hand. She tightly hugged her mother's body and cried like a hell. Her brother separated her from her mother's body and held Gudiya tightly. One can not even explain that moment ... Gudiya was totally broken. Her grandmother started shedding fake tears. It was 4 am.
In morning people (relative) started coming and faking their emotions. Those were the relatives who never came to meet Sarita or never helped her in crucial time and always discouraged her. Gudiya was numb and sitting like a stone..... from that day to till now there are so many feelings are words in Gudiya's mind which are unspoken. Still she is carrying all those memories in her heart and mind . Her approach towards life is totally changed now. After her Mother's death she completed her master's degree and joined a job. But as we all know that no one can take the place of mother in this whole world. She remembers her everyday ..
"No matter what anybody says about grief and about time healing all wounds, the truth is, there are certain sorrows that never fade away until the heart stops beating and the last breath is taken "
Soon i will come up with Gudiya's further life story. And i will write a novel on Sarita's life too . Because i cannot write each and every details here. There are other characters and little incidents too which i will add up in novel.
Thank you my dear Readers for reading this journey. If you want to ask anything related to this real story , you can mail me. Email link is given on side of the blog.
In Nov 2009 , Sarita got bedridden , her digestive system stopped working . She was unable to eat anything. She was on drip. Because of not having anything she was unable to move anywhere. She was all dependent on Gudiya and she felt really bad for this. She told gudiya that she felt very bad that she needs someone to move and even make her sit. But Sarita was brave enough and never got upset by her illness. All in her mind was that she will be fine soon. Because of chemotherapies she lost her hairs. But she never hesitated to accept it. Gudiya could understand this thing that how her mother was feeling about her hair loss and about her health. Her relatives and other people started discouraging that now there were no chances of her survival. Gudiya decided that from now onwards no one will meet her mother because she could not see her mother being discouraged. For 2 and half months sarita was on drip without having food or anything, she was unable to go to loo even because without eating anything one cannot be able to do .
In December Gudiya had her exams and she decided to skip them and stay back at home only. She used to talk about a lot things with her mother to make her smile and to make her positive. She used to say that you will be fine Maa ( mom ).. i will take you with me after my marriage and we shall live happily ..my husband and i will take care of you...you have to play with my kids too.
By the end of december the condition worsened , Sarita started to vomit blood. Gudiya was scared like hell because she knew that it is only her who means for her. Other family members were not too shook with her being ill and accepted that it was her time to go. Sarita's condition was very critical. From last three months she did not even slept for a single second because of pain and vomiting all the time and her loving daughter too had spent several sleepless nights taking care of her. Everthing was blue for Gudiya on that day because next day it was her birthday and all she wanted from god was her mom as her birthday gift. She denied to receive any call and wish and just keep on crying and praying to god. Her mother got little stable on her birthday. It was Gudiya's biggest birthday gift ever. Sarita wished her daughter and tears rolled down from their eyes. But there was something else in their destiny ....
Continued ....
I wish all of you Happy Navratri . In India it is started from today. It is festival of Hindu Deity Durga . For these nine days, nine forms of deity Durga are worshiped. God bless you all. And tomorrow i will write the last chapter of this true story.
Reports came and it was Stomach cancer ( andenocracinoma ). and year was june 2008 . It was the most tough moment for gudiya and she was not allowed to tell her about the disease. Sarita was the only soul in her life with whom she can share each and everything, with whom she used to plan everything . A lot of questions were in Sarita's mind too that what happened to her? what about reports etc. Life had lost its meaning for the young Gudiya...she decided to drop her study so that she can take care of her mother but her mother did not allow this. Treatment was started. When they first took Sarita to hospital till that time no one told her about the disease. It was the doctor who talked to her and later on she talked to regarding this. And Sarita was fully positive that she will be alright soon. But one cannot imagine that what was going in her mind. She was a very brave lady .
Sarita had gone through 13 chemotherapy and two major operations. And she and also faced so many side effects of these treatments. For Sarita it was not about getting treatment , it was seeing her husband and sons along with her...because concern and care is the thing with which a patient can get some relief. Money is not everything. It cannot own you a peace of mind. It is about a person's feeling....a person who is fighting with a dreadful disease. We cannot even imagine from what kind of mental situation and condition the person is going . The same was going in the life of Sarita. All she needed that time was love and care for which she had starved all her married life.
Gudiya was totally shattered but she never showed to anyone in her family. She used to cry alone and think a lot that why ll this happening with her mother. By the time gudiya got admission in master's programme (2009 ). Being good in studies and getting laurels in everything she did , a confident girl, was just runned by the thoughts of well-being of her mother. She used to go to college and after attending the lectures she immediately came back to take care of her mother. After second major operation of Sarita ..things turned bad. Doctors failed to cure the cancer and it started affecting the whole body of Sarita. All the organs stopped working one by one. There was no way out. Gudiya wanted to save her mother at any cost but from inside she too realized the truth.
Continued...
Gudiya had completed her higher secondary education and on her mind all things were about her family, about their ill treatment with her mother in the past. She decided to go abroad for higher studies and then suddenly on her own dropped the idea. No one knows the real reason that actually she did not want to leave her mother alone over here. Her brothers were also doing well. One went to abroad when she was in school and her second brother also started working. Her mother sarita supported and brought her up and this was the time when her mother needed her the most. Her mother told her that its your life and your choice , do whatever you want to do but remember one thing that you should know what is good and what is bad for you. I am always here, to guide you , but i want to see you happy and well educated. I don't want you to be like me. Concentrate on your study.
As an obedient daughter, devoted herself towards the study only. Mean while her brothers got married. She was the simple and next door girl. She helped her mother to settle down in a new built home by her father against her grandmother and uncles will. Gudiya's father blindly supported her grandmother. Gudiya used to go to college and after finishing her classes came back to home. She was very good at studies and a merit holder too. She shared everything with her mom. They used to go to market and temples. Sarita was her best friend and the whole world. Gudiya used to do the stupid and silly things to make her mom happy.Every year they used to go to Delhi and some other places too. It was gudiya's mother impact that she also became religious minded or we can say she inclined towards spiritual and religious things. But gudiya always asked her mother that you do so many rituals and other things for god but why god is not punishing the bad people , why god put you in so many troubles. Sarita's trust in god was unshaken. She used to spend 4-5 hours (daily) in meditation and worshiping God.
After completing her graduation she applied for some teaching degree. Time again took a turn and her mother Sarita was taken ill. Her uterus was removed by the doctor. But it was a wrong decision of the doctor. That doctor operated and said now everything is fine. Sarita was on bed rest for 2 months. She recovered slowly. After few months same problem started again . It was a year of 2008 . At this crucial moment Gudiya and her brother took their mother to some other city for proper check up. Sarita went through so many tests.. Everyone was waiting for the reports.
Continued........
In , 1988 , a bliss in Sarita's life , She was blessed with a baby girl. It was a ray of hope for her. She devoted herself to her baby girl. She wrote a letter to her husband about girl's birth to which he replied that we know that this will happen in Delhi . They were not at all happy with the birth of a girl. Three months later she returned to her husband's place, she and the tiny little tot were not welcomed by anyone. Her In-laws refused to see the baby girl. She ignored all this . Her daughter ( Gudiya) was her world.
As an infant aged three Gudiya became seriously ill with just some chances to survive. At this crucial point of time in life of the child and her mother, the baby was accepted by her In-laws . Somehow gudiya survived and this because of her mother's blessings and prayers. After sometime little girl was admitted to school. Sarita was happy and used to drop her to school everyday and pick up too. The mother daughter build up a world of their own in the small room in which sarita was living alone from last so many years. With the coming of this angel in her life, Sarita started going out in religious ceremonies and devoted herself to Lord krishna.
She started going to Delhi every year with gudiya. The little girl was lucky to her and somewhat change in their life. Things were changing or may be her point of view or may be something else but whatever it was ..it was good. Gudiya used to play with her mother. Sarita's mother in law and brother in law were still the same. They always did the partiality between gudiya and her cousin ( daughter of sarita's brother in law) . They used to give the money , chocolates , toys to her cousin and gudiya used to stand alone. But Sarita avoided all this . She tried to provide all the good things to her daughter.
With the time little girl grew up with all the understanding and care for her mother and realized the things which were going in her mother's life may it be her grandmother's or father's behavior towards her mother. She had become her mother's only support which was never there earlier. Her mother too had the high hopes for the girl. It was her mother's dream to see her as a working woman as she did not want the same ill happenings to be repeated for her lovely child. She always wanted best for her daughter. She did not had enough resources to give her everything but what ever she did, she gave her best. She used to teach her daughter. When gudiya was big enough to have thoughts of her own, a lots of things started running in her mind that why her mother was tolerating all this stuff from so many years??
Gudiya decided that it should be stopped. So one day she told her family members that no one is allowed to talk in a ill manner or misbehave with her mother.Because she saw so many times the bad behavior of her grand mother and of other members with her mother. And the behavior towards her mother did change after this .
Continued.....
After an year her husband went to delhi to asked Sarita to came back along. She was so innocent and forgivable that she got ready to come back in this hope that from now onwards her husband will take care of her. But this was not true. Life was again harsh for her. When she came back her elder son refused to come to her because her grandmother taught him that your mother left you alone over here and other negative things. It is easy to change child's mind and that is what she had done. Sometime later they took away her second son too. Now she was all alone. Her husband came only at night. Was this the only thing for which a person gets married ? What about one's other responsibilities towards his kids and wife? She was totally broken and shattered at that time.
Sarita used to awakened at 5 am by her mother in law and made to do the household work till 11 pm. She was not allowed to take rest or anything. It was a big joint family and their relatives (30-35 people) used to live along with them so it was her duty to make food for all of them for three times, to clean the house, to wash their clothes , to the kitchen work all alone. This was not the life she dreamt of and this was not the right way. The girl who was born and brought up in Delhi (metro city ) came in a small village...what did she expect? nothing more than a loving husband and care from her mother in law, but alas she got NOTHING.
By continous mental and physical torture she became very weak. Her in-laws used to beat her in front of her own kids. Her two brother in laws once beat her so brutally ..they pulled her from her hairs and dragged her on the brick floor by which the skin of her back ripped off and then they locked her in one room .
After that she decided to live separately in the same house. She got one room and kitchen on the first floor. God only knew how did he make her. She still had some hope that things will go fine . She used to live alone in that room. Her kids were kept by her mother in law and they were not permitted to meet their mother. Her only hope was her unshaken trust on almighty God . Still she made to work by her In-laws ,though she was living separately. She was like a servant or slave for them . 13 years passed like this ... unending torture by her In- laws.
After some time she came to know about her third pregnancy . She started praying to God that she wants a Girl child. She went to Delhi for her delivery .
Continued...
Sarita was made to get married in 1975. Her parents did their best for the marriage arrangements. She must have thought that life would be the same or might even be better there that it was at her parents house. But life has its own harsh ways. On the very day of her marriage while on the way to her new home with in-laws, her mother in law started cursing about the dowry and also started complaning about the arrangements etc. This was her first step outside her parent's house and the kind of treatment she got shattered her. Her husband whom she found to be handsome by looks did not support or even try to console the young girl who had to listen to such curses on the very first day of her new life. Life ahead was the similar as the way she was treated on the first day. She was always discouraged and ill-treated by her in-laws. And she being a good girl, like her mother might have taught never complained and waited for the things to get right . It was her daily routine to get ill-treated by her mother in law and brother in laws. They used to beat her for no god sake reasons. Her mother in law kept all the eatable items , milk and the items of luxury soap etc hidden from the newly wed wife. She was not allowed to go out of the house, her in-laws said it was not a part of their traditions. Once she asked for a permission from her mother in law to go to temple with his husband. Her mother in law refused it. When Sarita tried to talk to her husband regarding it , then he slapped her. Her mother in law took all new saris ( dresses ) and ornaments of sarita. Again if she ever requested to go out with her hubby to anywhere she was beaten by her evil mother in law.
After one year her first son was born. Her mother in law always kept her busy in household works and she was not allowed to carry her little child even if he was crying or hungry. Things went bad and bad every single day. Was getting married is the only thing ?? What about the responsibilities towards the bride?? She leaves her home and everything and expect good things, but here what did sarita get ? Disappointment , physical and mental harrasment all the time, lack of support from her husband???? She was not even allowed to meet her parents.
Somehow once she managed to write a letter to her parents and her father came and enquired about everything, the In-laws then promised not to do anything bad to her. And like any other father he went back. Her parents just like her were very simple and not that clever and did easily get into the talks of her in-laws.
In 1978 her second son was born. The conditions got worse. They took away her first son and locked her in one room. Her father came to know about her condition and this time he took her along with him and her 2nd kid. Her In-laws kept the first kid with them forcefully. She moved to delhi and joined a job there. Things were going good, as did not had to go through the daily sufferings which had become a part of her life at her in-laws house. Once again she started living her life in a good way. But something else was in her fate....
Continued ....
Hello my dear readers , today i am going to write a real story of a real woman ( my known ) who gave up her all dreams because of her husband , her in-laws , her kids and for society. Out of 54 years of her life she spend 35 years as a no less then a slave. This is not just a story but a story of suffering, story of the pain in life of a married lady, story of her never breaking trust in God, story of her love with her daughter the only one who cared for her. Soon i am going to publish a novel on this story because i cannot write each and every details here. All the copyrights of this story is with me. I am going to change the name and location for privacy concern. I will tell you about her journey via my blogs which will continue under the same blog. Which means daily you can check this blog for further updates.
Chapter - 1
Prakash was a smart and intelligent guy but he was aggressive too. After finishing his studies he joined police force in 1950. After 4 years he got married to a beautiful girl , chandarkala. They started living in Aadampur but soon they shifted to delhi because of his job. Chandarkala was a homely girl soon she was expecting with the first baby and in 1955 she gave birth to a lovely girl child. That baby girl was named as Sarita . As you know in Indian society most of people want a boy baby . But this girl Sarita was no less than a boy for her mother. As time was passing Chandarkala gave birth to three other girls one by one. And all this was happening in a want of boy baby. They were giving a try in order to get a boy baby.Actually it was only Praksh and her mother's will . Chandarkala was not allowed to say anything against their will. Her parents were dead. So she was totally dependent on his husband. Sarita helps her mother in taking care of her other three sisters.
After having 4 girls, Chandarkala gave birth to twin boys. But physically she became very weak . Now the whole responsibility of the kids was on Eldest girl Sarita. She used to take care of her siblings. She took them to school, feed them on a time and also do household works. But she was dearest to her mother. She was living her life in a her own way.Her family was having all the facilities which every upper middle class family had at that time. She was very fond of photographs , i mean she loved to get clicked. At that time cameras were not affordable to everyone. So she usually went to the shop to get clicked and she also took her brothers along with her. In short she was a man of the house. She was very good at studies and she wanted to become a teacher but those were not the times when a girl could easily opt for whatever she wanted to achieve . But still she completed her higher secondary education and apply for graduation.
But there was something else in her fate. Soon one of her father's cousin came with a marriage proposal for Sarita. Sarita refused it first but later on that lady showed her the picture of that handsome guy and sarita got carried away by his looks. Her father's cousin also told them that this guy is very rich , your daughter will live as a queen. In the end they said yes to that proposal. That handsome guy was yuvraj . He send her a card which was in a shape of Taj mahal . She was flattered by his gestures. Soon her future in-laws decided to come to delhi to see her .
One day she went to market on cycle , wearing jeggings and shirt and on the way back to home she saw one lady and guy sitting on rikshaw ,who were heading towards her home. She got the hint that they were her future in-laws. She crossed them in hurry . At home after meeting ..both families fixed everything and guy's family refused to take anything ( dowry ). They want a simple marriage. Everyone was very happy. That girl started dreaming about her future wedding life. But she had no idea at that time it will be bed of thorns instead of roses.
Continued...
